Go Giants!

AT&T is hosting a few Tellme folks like myself to a Giants vs. Dodgers game. We've got a kickass view from the AT&T box right behind home plate (I wouldn't expect anything less, given it's the AT&T park, right?). Should be a good game. ;)

In other news, Jon just texted to let me know Logan said Elmo for the first time at school today! :)

Hot Pink, Hot Damn.

I've noticed I'm becoming a big fan of Puma's. Their shoes help me accessorize with more style than a pair of normal running shoes, yet still provide the support I need for proper back alignment and short daytime walks.

My body and back are already thanking me (at least, that's how I justified my latest new purchase). :)

Happy (Belated) Birthday Jessie!

This past week flew by so quickly, I forgot to blog about Logan's friend Jessie - who just turned the big numero uno last Friday! :) It's a huge deal since Jessie is the "last one" of our kiddie group! And, none of us can believe she's already one - or that all of our babies are no longer really babies. *sigh*

We had a really nice celebration at Jessie's house where all the kids got together to play and steal toys (click on the pic above for more, taken by Nathan). We had to leave a bit early since Logan was starting to wind down and needed his naptime badly, but not before we all had some yummy fruit, pizza and birthday cake - YEAH!

Happy Big Birthday Jessie! We're so happy and proud of you and your family!! We look forward to celebrating many many more with you! :)

Get Your Kicks on Route 66

My colleague Byron and I decided to stop by Ted Drewes, a St. Louis tradition, for dessert tonight. And OHMYGAWD. Was it ever the hoppin' hot-spot - on a weeknight no less!

Here's Byron standing in line in front of the crazy crowd!

The place was buzzin' with tons of atmosphere and history - it was pretty awesome and hard not to get a little excited. :)

I got an "Original Sin" specialty (a sundae with tart cherries and hot fudge). I wasn't so sure about the idea of eating frozen custard (Jon is the one in our family with the sweet tooth) but it was actually pretty tasty.

And, I have to say, the overall experience earned a point back in my book for the city of St. Louis.

Sometimes I don't like to travel

I can't say I'm a big fan of St. Louis and yet, I'm back again.

I spent the morning on client calls before saying good-bye to my sweet darling smiling son, dropping him off at school and then racing off to my flight. My friend and colleague Amanda was just chatting to me the other day about the difference between those who travel often and those who don't. She felt she landed in the "don't" category, and therefore was going to show up to her flight (she was also traveling on business this week) an hour, or hour and a half Amanda?, early. I, on the other hand, must fall into the "often" category (in Amanda's mind at least). Since, I decided to grab lunch on my way to the gate, ordering it to go, and finally waltzing up to tag the end of the line and hear our flight's last calls over the intercom.

It's a theme of mine - cutting it close.

The flight was packed, and I've been coming down with another cold (interestingly, the last time I was sick ALSO hit me during a trip to St. Louis. I think my body is telling me I must be allergic to this town. RIGHT?), so I ended up sleeping with my mouth wide open for most of the flight, the demure woman that I am. Which, was really just too bad, because my back was aching me something terrible, and yet I didn't have enough energy to stand at the back of the plane (like I usually try to do).

Halfway through the flight, we had some turbulence that was, let's just say, not insignificant. I've flown a fair number of times in my life, and turbulence has never really bothered me. Yet today, I found my mind racing, dreaming up a ridiculously bleak and dismal scene where our plane tumbles to the ground, crashing and burning in the process. Tellme would mourn the loss of two loyal employees, Stanford would mourn the loss of their Track team, and Jon would be faced with the impossible task of raising Logan on his own, trying to explain to him that his Mommy wouldn't be coming home (ever) again. I imagined how petrified I would be, plummeting to earth while it happened. And, if all that weren't appalling enough, I found myself planning out my "only" chance of survival, wondering if I could use the ridiculously obese woman taking up three seats in the row across from me, as some sort of shield to help absorb the impact. Yes, this awful awful awful thought actually crossed my mind! (I'm not proud of it)

I tell you this story only to get you to understand HOW MUCH my perspective on life has changed since having Logan. I have never been so afraid to die, so worried of what will happen to my family and friends, so concerned about my husband and son, and so willing to do anything to protect us all, as I am these days. I used to drive, or ride with those who would drive, recklessly, throwing all caution to the wind. Now I am that mom. Gripping the oh shit bar, tight lipped and slamming my foot into the floorboard to brake. I used to chat with anyone online, go out on dates with random strangers, flirt and have fun at the local bar scene or hitch-hike home in a country where I wasn't completely fluent in the language and the driver was drinking a can of beer. Now I am that mom. I see young girls posting up silly comments on blogs or streaming live video of their slumber parties and think OH HELL NO will my daughter (or son) ever be allowed to do that. I used to sleep through any amount of turbulence and scoff at those who turned green. Now I am that mom. Freaking out about a bumpy ride, praying we get through the flight safe and sound so I can see my chubby cheeked toddler once again.

It's a little depressing, this revelation of mine. And yet, it's also rejuvenating. I've always taken on a Mama Bear persona, but now that I'm actually a mom, I can let it shine through, without any embarrassment, awkwardness or explanation whatsoever.

I like it.

Somewhere between California and Missouri, after the turbulence and gruesome daydreaming subsided, I discovered I had lost one of my earrings. One of my precious diamond earrings. And, I was bummed for the rest of the night.

I can't watch TV - sorry, lost an earring. I can't read my book - sorry, lost an earring. I can't concentrate on my work - sorry, lost an earring. I can't go downstairs and hit the gym - HELLO! I just lost a, wait for it..... diamond earring!

Waaaaah. I wanna go home. I miss Jon, I miss Logan. There's this huge empty King-size bed staring at me, inviting me to sleep, yet all I can think about is how much more comfortable it would be crammed up against a big guy, a little guy, a leggy dog and three purring cats on our maxed out Queen-size bed. That and, I just lost my fucking earring.

Pathetic

I know, a picture says a thousand words.... but I feel like I should at least give a little background as to WHY Odin looks like a helpless invalid right now.

Norwegian Elkhounds are one of those breeds prone to getting sebaceous cysts. And Odin, unfortunately, has had the bad luck of MORE cysts than our vet or breeder has ever seen on an Elkhound. Aren't we all just lucky ducky? :( What's worse, sometimes the cysts will seep or get infected, which encourages both Odin and Lola to lick, bite and scratch at the sores until they are raw and super sensitive to the touch.

As time has passed, it's gotten so bad that we've had to keep the two dogs separated during the day when we're at work. Odin wanders the house with a cone on his head (so that he doesn't lick the cysts himself) while Lola is kept crated all day, storing up all of that ridiculous Lola-energy to unleash on us the minute we get home.

In any case, Jon forgot to separate the two of them when he left for work on Friday and unfortunately, Lola WENT TO TOWN on one of Odin's larger cysts on his upper back/shoulder. When we got home, it had become a huge wound that, overnight, developed a terrible infection and made you wince just looking at it. :( We cleaned and medicated it (we have an antibiotic cream specifically for this sort of flare up) 2-3 times a day throughout the weekend, dressing it with huge pieces of gauze and self-adhesive tape to try and allow the wound to heal on its own.

I took him to the vet this morning and, given the severity of the wound, we decided to just clean it out as best as possible and medicate Odin with oral antibiotics, hoping that the sore and infection will heal over the next few days before our vet tries removing the cyst. I asked what I could do to keep it covered (since it's an open wound) and/or how I could keep Odin from scratching it raw (which he's been doing since he can't lick it himself).

The vet said I could try putting a t-shirt on him to keep the sore covered while it heals and to put socks on Odin's hind paws, so that if he DOES try scratching himself, at least his nails won't dig in and make the sore worse.

So, that's exactly what I did. Pathetic, isn't it? :)

When I got home tonight, the socks were off and scattered on the floor. It doesn't look like he scratched himself (since the t-shirt was still on and covering the sore), so I think it's actually going to help quite a bit! We'll see.

You know it's hot when...

...your hubby forgets to put the 4am milk bottle (that has ~2oz of milk left in it) back into the fridge at night....and instead leaves it sitting in Logan's room the entire day until you find it that night when you are putting Logan down for bed.

I opened it up to wash it out and the remaining milk inside was CHUNKY.

Yuck. Ick. Gross.

I think we skipped over Spring and went right into Summer this past week. The weather has been BEE-utiful! :) We spent most of the weekend outside and were EXHAUSTED by this evening (partly, I think, because of too much sun, but oh well).

We got a "ride-on" toy for Logan while we were out - since he's so interested in scooters and tricycles, etc. I thought he might like to try this out (it's sort of the first step before navigating pedals I guess).

He's really into it! But, it's still a TAD bit tall for him, so he can't push off and get the speed he wants. As our neighbor pointed out, that's not a problem, since he'll be tall enough by next week. ;-)

I just noticed on the Little Tike's website that kids can bounce on it to move it forward, which means kids don't actually have to reach the ground to get it to go!

Doh!

I'm going to have to show that to Logan tomorrow. Especially since he's been trying to jump/hop lately! :)

Play sets... for Men

I've been wanting to check out the play sets from Backyard Adventures
for awhile since I want to find something fun for our backyard.

Most are super huge for our little backyard but all of them are super
AWESOME. I'm trying to convince Jon we can manage a small no frills
one for Logan.

He's not biting. *sigh*

Van Gogh in Training

Just bought a new arts and crafts book for toddlers recommended by a
friend (thanks Jenn!). I'll have to start buying some frames since I
don't have much fridge real estate left to display all the new artwork! ;)

No Biting

Yesterday when I picked Logan up from school, the teachers were beaming with pride. Logan had a GREAT day! Logan did REALLY well! Logan was in an AWESOME mood!!

I thought it was a little strange that they were so excited. After all, he's usually in a great smiley mood. So why were they talking about it so much, like it's the first time he's done well?

And then we got right down to it.

He didn't even bite a kid. Not once!

Ahhhhhhh. The light blinked on in my head.

So, the teachers can get just as frustrated as I can with this crazy kid of mine. Good to know.

What's more - they were SO happy, that they repeated the whole GREAT REALLY AWESOME FANTASTIC MOOD speech all over again this morning when I dropped him off.

Wow, he must really be making a great first impression with the new teachers. hehe

As it turns out, it was a huge deal. Because, as I've mentioned before, Logan's gotten into the habit of not only pushing, but biting too. It's extremely frustrating trying to reprimand a 16 month old about biting, putting him in a time-out for 30 seconds, explaining that what he does hurts people. He looks up at you, grins real big and gives a huge hug. And, if you continue on your scolding session as you put him in the time-out, he suddenly looks very confused and starts to scream, kick and cry. He just doesn't get it.

At any rate, not only did he not bite a single kid yesterday, he was actually in a tempting situation to bite a kid but still didn't. Which is also huge. When another kid came up to him and took away a toy, instead of biting or hitting back, he just screamed really loudly.

Which, sounds bad at first, but is in fact a step in the right direction. Because, it meant he was trying to verbalize his disapproval rather than lashing out with his teeth instead. The teachers felt this was a great step forward, and I'd have to agree. They even encouraged him when it happened - telling him it was great he was trying to use his words and told him it was okay to say "MINE" back at his fellow classmate if that happened again.

And then another light clicked on.

SHIT. They're teaching him how to say "mine".

I suppose it's an improvement over biting, but man oh man. What am I going to do when he goes around stealing everyone's toys from their hands (or not sharing his own) yelling MINE directly to their face? How exactly do you tell him NOT to do that after we taught him that's what he should do? I guess we'll deal with it when the time comes, but I can't say I'm looking forward to it.

Falafels

Logan and I stopped by the Falafel's Drive In (the best!) to pick up
dinner tonight (Daddy has another late night maintenance). The owners
have known our family since I was a baby, and love to pinch Logan's
cheeks while reminding me how I was once that small.

Tonight they gave him a free mini banana shake with his falafel balls,
hummus and fries and I had to wrestle the damn cup free from his death
grip just so he wouldn't make a mess in the car on the way home.

Mean mean Mommy.

(He screamed the entire 3 mile ride home to let me know it, too. *sigh*)

Cutting it close

I thought I had enough gas to get me to lunch and back home before
refueling. But on my way home (after lunch) I realized I was reading
the dash wrong the whole time! Since, that 72 number never changed.
The gas light blinking on BRIGHT was what finally clued me in.

2 miles worth of gas left. Whoops! Good thing I was near a Costco
when I noticed. heh :)

Tag!

I wasn't actually tagged by Elizabeth, but I just saw her post and I'm in a silly goofy mood so what the heck. Let's play along....

Take a picture of yourself right now.
No primping or preparing.
Just snap a picture.
Load the picture onto your blog.
Tag some people to play along.
And if that's not enough, tag a few more.

Wanna see what a tired and disappointedinSimonforsavingtheJustinTimberlakelookalike Mom looks like at 10:30pm on a Wednesday night?

*drum roll*

Ta-da!

Happy Tax Day everyone.

The Teen Years

Logan is now sixteen. 16 months old, that is. But, he might as well be sixteen with the way his personality and attitude has changed this last month. Which means, I get flashes of what it's going to be like reining in a teenager.

My little teenager is an extremely picky and slow eater, and I hear that he gets this from his mom. He takes forever to eat a couple measly bites of mac n' cheese, inspecting and dissecting every possible noodle. If there is a speck of some other food mixed in, forget it. He knows when I'm trying to sneak in a green veggie (the horror!) and won't have any of it.

Most of the time Logan is an extremely happy kid and for that, we are eternally grateful. But make sure you don't rub him the wrong way. Always temperamental, as if he were already dealing with raging hormones, he can get impatient at the blink of an eye and throw the biggest tantrum of them all.

Just the other night, he was upset that poor Mommy dearest couldn't pick him up and put him to bed for the night. It tore me up inside to see my extremely tired heartbroken child looking up at me, imploring me with those big doe eyes and arms outstretched. Tired of his dad, all he wanted was a little cuddle and warm embrace from mom, and because I'm on a strict "nothing over 5 lbs" lifting rule, I had to meanly deflect his requests to Jon instead. Which of course, brought out the most severe back-arching tears-streaming tantrum I've seen in some time. Poor guy. :(

And, as I've mentioned in a few past posts, he continues to be extremely active and physical. He's a curious brute, and is often times testing the boundaries with his physicality. He's prone to hit, push, bite, and throw. And is slowly learning what he can and cannot get away with. His attitude definitely tests our patience, especially because he's so strong willed and independent.

Within the last month, Logan's sleep schedule has (finally) normalized. He still wakes up in the middle of the night on occasion, but I'd say the majority of the time we actually get a full night's rest. FINALLY. It's taken a long time to get to this stage but OHMYGOD how wonderful it is to finally get some much needed sleep. I'm guessing this is why many siblings are about 2 yrs apart - since parents naively think the coast is clear, easily forgetting how hard those sleepless nights were, and start trying for another. HA.

Sesame Street has become our best friend, our savior. We LOVE Sesame Street. We ADORE Sesame Street. We KISS the ground that Sesame Street walks on. Why? Because our hyper-active antsy little boy actually pays attention and watches the show for more than 2 seconds, allowing Mommy to steal away and pee in private. He is captivated by the songs, the sounds, the pictures, the characters, and of course, ELMO. He gets amped up anytime "Elmo's World" starts; jumping up and down, screaming, pointing to the TV, as if I don't hear the high-pitched whine of that red furry beast with my own two ears.

Yes Logan. It's Elmo. I see!

Just recently, Logan picked up his favorite new word/phrase - "UH-OH" - which he repeats about 15,834,927 times a day. It's pretty damn cute and gives me good warning anytime he's dropped thrown his sippy cup down on the floorboard of the car.

He still isn't much of a talker, choosing to sign or babble in his own sweet language instead. I know it's only a matter of time though. Before we know it, the flood gates will open and loud unstoppable chattery will flow from his mouth. Just like his father.

UH-OH indeedy.

33 and recovering

3 weeks ago I turned 33. And, I completely forgot (to blog) about it.

But the day before yesterday, as I stared down at my hospital bracelet butt-naked save for a thin sheet wrapped around my front, waiting for my doc to start his symphony along my spinal nerves, it finally hit me. Whoa. I'm 33.


I suppose the fact that I didn't make much fanfare of the big day just goes to show how much our lives have really changed. Our world no longer strictly revolves around me and Jon, but around our little Logan instead. :) We're the parents now - no more birthday celebrations for us.

And, it's how it should be. I'm getting older, big whoop. But Logan's getting older (and cuter!). Now that's a BIG WHOOP!


For those who are wondering, my procedure on Monday went well, albeit a bit more painful than before. It's never a good sign when you hear your doctor say "let's try something different and see if we can get it at this angle instead" while a couple of needles are digging into your back.

Suffice it to say, I have a couple of large bone spurs at the exact location where my doc needs to get to, to administer the steroid injections, making the procedure more challenging for him and more painful for me.

I'm still recovering but doing better each day. The worst part of it all is that I'm not allowed to pick up, nor carry, anything over 5 lbs (aka Logan) for a week. Oy vey.

(Always getting into trouble, here he's
testing Sanka's patience by laying on top of her)

Bullies are for wimps

Logan spent a few hours in the big kid (Jr. Preschool) classroom today. Overall, he did really well - which is to be expected. He doesn't seem to have any issues with new environments and unknown territories. In fact, he pretty much goes up to any good lookin' stranger asking for a hug, a kiss and an arms straight up in the air "pick me up NOW please" motion.

The only time where he struggled a little bit was during snack time. He was a little overwhelmed, and mostly distracted, by ALL the kids sitting together in their tiny chairs and little tables, eating their snacks in screeching unison. Mr. Logan was a little thrown off by the lack of attention and applause while flinging his snacks clear across the room. I'm sure once he starts pelting the new teachers in the ass, they'll pay more attention.

Logan is actually one of three young boys in his Pre-Tot class to move up to Jr. Preschool at the same time. One of those boys is Logan's best friend, let's call him Jacob. They have been together since they were infants and have really gotten along well. I remember back in the early days in the infant room, teachers would tell me stories about how Jacob and Logan would nap at the same time and the minute one of them woke up, the other would too, and they would just sit in their respective cribs (which happened to be next to each other) making faces, smiling and laughing and sticking their fingers through the crib slats over to the other side. And, if one of them wasn't there during nap time, the one that was would get extremely upset. These best buds were inseparable.

So, I was happy to hear they are both moving up together.

Logan and Jacob, who are very much alike in strength, build and overall personality have one of many fun games they like to play called PUSH EACH OTHER (and then laugh). I'm sure it's innocent fun and the two of them think it's hilarious to play with one another. But, what happens when Logan thinks it's a game suitable to play with other kids as well?

Enter in Boy #3 - let's call him Josh. This guy isn't as socially outgoing nor as physical as Logan (or Jacob). He's a softie. And, I hate to say it, but you can see the reason why, the minute you meet his mom.

So when Jon told me that Logan tried the game on Josh today too (who got upset and started to cry, while Logan laughed with glee), I did what any respectable parent would do.

I laughed. I snickered. And I smiled with delight.

How horrible a reaction is that? I had to think twice. Why was that my first and natural reaction? Neither Jon nor I were bullied, nor bullies, when growing up. We didn't cave to peer pressure. We were taught to be tough, strong, and stand up for what we believed in. So why did I swell with pride at the mention of my son pushing another kid around?

The more I thought about it, the more I realized well, perhaps I could have sometimes been perceived as a bully..... maybe?

I can remember a few instances that might put me on the bully/bullied fence.

Like when a neighborhood boy who was a few years older than me (I was maybe 8?), was picking on my brothers and the twin boys down the street (all younger than me). I literally got in his face, in front of my brothers and the other two boys, and told that neighborhood kid to get off our property. Get lost and pick on someone your own size, and/or your own age. He scuttled away - thank GOD.

Or that one time in the 3rd grade when a boy pulled on my pig-tails, so I punched him in the face (some 20 yrs later, perhaps he was flirting?).

What about the time I started at a brand new school as a young whipper snapper 6th grader - and while waiting for lunch in the cafeteria, I apparently looked at a big 8th grade girl the wrong way. Yes, I looked at her wrong. And, she with the huge ego and attitude, felt it was important to pick on the scrawny little 6th grader.

OH NO SHE DI'INT.

Boy, did that piss me off. I would NOT back down, even when my friends told me to ignore her. Instead, I told her to shut it. She didn't know what a look was, but if she really wanted me to give her a look, I'd be happy to the next time around (good thing I didn't pee in my pants right in front of her).

There were plenty of "almost knock 'em down drag 'em out" fights on the soccer and softball fields all through high school because someone's reputation was on the line. And there was me, the Captain for Christ's sake!, leading the charge. I think the only time I actually walked back to the dugout with my head hanging a little lower was when I got the don't you even think about it glare from my Dad who happened to be watching on the sidelines. Whoops.

You could even look at recent events, and say my meddling intervention with Logan's move up schedule was in some ways perceived as a form of bullying. Since, after all, I wouldn't back down nor take no for an answer. It was my nice way of telling the Directors they better listen to me, or else.

But c'mon. Am I really a bully? I don't think I am. :) Sure, I may be stubborn. I may be confident, aggressive, maybe even competitive. But I am also fiercely loyal and unafraid to take a stand and speak up when I think someone (even myself) has been wronged.

For now, we'll scold Logan when he bullies another, but we'll also give him the freedom to learn and develop his own sense of worth, of confidence, competitiveness and loyalty. We'll guide him as best we can, as our parents guided us.

I'll just need to make sure to bite my tongue the next time I run into Josh's mom at school. Since, the competitive do-gooder 'bully' in me really wants to speak up... just a little.

Hey! Remember when you insisted on putting Josh into the big kid class before he was really ready because you wanted him to be potty trained before age 2?

Well. Welcome to the big kids' school yard. *smirk*

Wheeeeeeeeee!!

Or is it Wiiiiiiiiiiiiii? :)

I've been wanting to get a Wii Fit for a long time now. And, after chatting with Jarrod about it yesterday while at Marine World (he just got one for his birthday), I decided it was time to finally bite the bullet and buy one (he had rave reviews, but the kicker for me was the price is now, finally, below $100 bucks!).

So, we did some serious damage at Costco today, grabbing a Wii Fit and a truckload of other must-haves. Logan passed out on the ride home, which was perfect because it gave Jon and I some time to link our Mii profiles and get started on our fitness regimen! My trainer claims I have a Wii Fit Age of 44 (ack!) while Jon's is at a mere 37. However, my BMI is in the "normal" range while his is in the "overweight" range. How does that work?

I blame my high Wii Fit Age on the fact that Logan woke up just as I was finally setting my own profile up, and thought it would be fun to stomp and play on the Wii Fit board alongside Mommy during her tests. It doesn't do so well for my balance score when I'm standing on one leg in Tree Pose, with a kid hanging off me. ;-)

And, we got the game just in time. Tomorrow I am scheduled for another series of injections. The chronic pain I deal with has really beaten me down lately, so I'm actually looking forward to this visit tomorrow.

In a couple of weeks, I will be so ready for the Wii Fit challenges.

Bring it Wii Trainer. I dare you.

A Motley Crew

We just got Logan's school pictures today and thanks to our brand new scanner, I'm able to share them with you! Here he is with his classmates (the flirt is in Miss Kim's arms, of course!). Look at that smile!


And here is his personal portrait. I wasn't sure what to expect but I'm really happy how they turned out! Totally staged but pretty funny and cute, all in one. :)

Book Signings

Today was a loooooong day where I attended the Invent Your Future Conference for Women, and because I am now fighting a pounding headache, I don't have much energy to write a long post.

But, I will tell you that I attended two book signings at the conference during the day. One was with Cokie Roberts, an amazing woman who I enjoy listening to, but who I know my parents LOVE EVEN MORE (Hi Mom and Dad!) and the other was with Bertice Berry who I had never heard of before the conference, but her stories were so wonderfully touching to me that she ended up being the highlight of the conference for me. In fact, her break-out session was exactly what I was looking for out of that conference, even though I didn't know it when I walked in and registered that morning.

The funny thing is, I also had a planned book signing to attend to this evening, in downtown Mountain View, to support my fave blogger Dooce (LOVE that woman!), whose book just came out recently as well.

That's right. Three book signings in one day.

I don't know what it is, but I've become more and more interested in attending book signings like these. I think I'm becoming a book signing slut! And boy, do these events just take it out of you. I'm now exhausted, nursing a headache and feeling a little grimy from playing musical conference chairs all day.

*sigh*

And, for those that are interested, the signed books now lying on my bedside table are:

• We Are Our Mothers' Daughters: Revised and Expanded Edition by Cokie Roberts
• The Ties That Bind: A Memoir of Race, Memory and Redemption by Bertice Berry
• It Sucked and Then I Cried: How I Had a Baby, a Breakdown, and a Much Needed Margarita by Heather Armstrong (Dooce)

Do I get around or what?